Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Where did April go?

April was a whirlwind of a month, and March seems to be off to an equally heavy start, but we'll see where things go. It feels like this past month was riddled with death, illness, and misfortune - but at the same time I was shown more of the beauty of life and more of the good in people than I am usually able to see. Classic yin and yang. Through it all, I have tried to practice thankfulness. I have very much to be thankful for.

With all that's been going on, and I won't go into specifics, I feel like I have fallen behind in the little things that I usually try to stay on top of - taking away from rather than adding to the clutter in my studio, going to the gym, cooking during my weekend to have food ready for my work week, listing new items in my shop, etc. I am hoping to soon come to a point where I feel caught up, and I think that that time is coming sooner rather than later. Until then, I will try keep my head above water in this sea of "to do's."

What can those little things matter, you might wonder? So what if weeks worth of dirty laundry are piling up? So what if my level of physical fitness is declining? So what if I can't save a penny? Clearly, there are more important things to tend to!  Well, yes - but also - it is important to "listen" to when you feel overwhelmed. You can't take care of other people to the best of your ability if you aren't taking care of yourself. Easier said than done. 

For me, the challenge is in having down time when I am AWAKE. I know how to be awake and working and productive. I know how to be deep asleep. I have in fact, mastered both of these modes, and in switching between the two at the drop of a hat. Where I fail is in resting while conscious. To practice relaxing while awake, I have started reading in bed before going to sleep, before both literally and figuratively flipping a switch. And on that note, I'm off to read. Or crash. Whichever.

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